I apologize to anyone who was waiting for my post last night, I was involved with my church, and had no time to post.
However, I am here now! To discuss Compassion in regards to difficult people more.
Before that though, I want to preface it by saying this:
If it seems like I have a very set idea of these things, I apologize for this isn’t the case. I’m always looking for input, discussion, and ideas that will help me grow in regards to these things. For me to grow, and for everyone else to grow, we must discuss these concepts. I realize that sometimes it sounds a bit preachy, what I post. But I don’t want it to be as such. I would like it to be a community focused on development, with these just being potential points to start a deeper discussion.
That being said, sometimes when we are discussing things, especially online, toxicity is incredibly prevalent. This, is when we get to Practice Compassion. Always, it is hard to deal with people we think intolerable. Perhaps it is their views, their way of acting, values they hold dear, etc. Whatever it may be, there are just people that irk us in the world.
Yet, this is not very perceptive of us. To simply see others for the words they say or how they act is to see the outward expression of who they are inside. People go through troubles, they have hard upbringings, stress in their life, and an innumerable amount of other issues which weigh on their mind to varying degrees. Some people would argue that since words and actions are all others have to judge a person off of, it is okay to treat others the ways that their actions call for.
I would disagree. Yes, the outward form is important. But, inward content shapes the form that the outward expressions take. Therefore, we must always see form as an aspect of content, and vice versa. They must coexist to create a person, and one is not separate from the other.
So, when someone does something that is outwardly rude, childish, stubborn, short-sighted, mean, obnoxious, etc., we must aim to use Compassion. What inward content do they have which makes them do these things? When do I do the same things, and what are my reasons when I do so? These are important things to ponder. Not only do we end up Understanding ourselves better, but it gives an Understanding that people are different situation to situation. Just because someone cuts you off while driving doesn’t mean that they are immediately whatever choice words you may choose to call them. They are a person who is a product of the moment they are within. People are not always able to rise above the situation and keep a steady character. I know that I certainly can’t always, no matter how hard I try.
This is why Compassion is necessary. When we can use it to understand others better, we reach a new level of happiness and peace with our life. What does getting angry at someone really do for me? Why do I focus on their mistakes, when I should focus on bettering myself? How are they like me?
All of these things help us practice Compassion. No one Understands Life and those who claim to Understand it usually Understand it least of all.
Yet, I could be wrong about all of this. This is merely what I have experienced to be true. It is a multi-faceted issue, but in the end, I think that Compassion should be the default reaction to difficult people. There are certainly times when I must aim to denounce what others do, but even in those moments, can I not practice Compassion, or at least try?
As always, this is a place of respect and of acceptance of ideas, with the opportunity for constructive discussion. I encourage posting a comment, or even just doing self-reflection and journaling about these ideas.
So that we may all become better people.